Why I do not own a gun

This past Thursday I started my afternoon session with a new patient who was 11 years old. She was a very pleasent albeit quiet young girl who was in the office with her grandmother who is her legal guardian. The girls mother was murdered when she was 6 years old. The girl had been a straight A student up to this year, although was now struggling with her schoolwork and acting out at school. She also had some inappropriate encounters with other children. The day before her visit with me, she told her grandmother that her grandfather had been sexually abusing her. God bless this grandmother because the first thing she did was call the police and put his ass in jail. The second call was to DHS to make sure that he does not have contact with any of their grandchildren and the last call was to a divorce attorney. She is a strong women and I admire her beyond words.

This little girl was so very brave to tell. She single handedly turned her family upside down but in telling she in turn protected them all. Unfortunately, child abuse is something I deal with on a somewhat regular basis, but it breaks up me up every single time. I am always in awe of the bravery and strength of the childre who tell and saddened by their loss of innocence. I worry for all the children out there who haven't yet told.

And I hope and pray that the grandfather rots in jail for a very very very long time!

Where we are...

TTC#1 cycle 9. sigh

It is a strange place to be I feel. We have not been trying half as long as some but longer than most who have not had any diffaculties. We are that the point where friends say "oh it took us this long to get pregnant" and we have surpassed them all, not including the ones who went on to fertility treatments of course. I have 8 cycles of charts, 6 months of CBEFM use, 1 normal HSG, 1 questionable SA, 13 pregnant friends, and a partridge in a pear tree to show for it.

I think we can officially say...Houston we have a problem! And so we have made our first RE apt for November. I thought I would be ok with that. Look at it from the medical point of view. Find out where the problem is and fix it. Turns out not so much. I put alot more into this past failed cycle than I thought. I had my HSG and hey lots of women get pregnant after their HSG because it cleanses the tubes, even if they really did not have any blockages. The OB doing the test even threw that out there for me to hang on to. I chose not to look at the stats showing a very mildly increase in fertility s/p HSG and rather at the cover of People with Trista Sutton who got pregnant immediately after her test. Because isn't People where we should get our medical info from after all. So instead of calculating due dates and figuring out how close my baby would be in age to my friends children, I instead am hoping on the bitter bus and taking it to buy lots of baby shower gifts for other people.

All the cool kids are doing it

It seems that everyone and their brother has a blog now so why not me? We will see how this goes as all prior attempts at journaling stopped at "Dear Diary".



So what am I ever going to talk about?????? Well I am kinda hoping that this will help me wrap my mind around the diffaculties Frank and I are having with the whole getting knocked up thing. If it was only as easy as the nuns back in high school made it seem. Then again, what the hell does a nun know about getting pregnant. hmm........